I mean, no offense but what you suggest sounds like a reaction from a 12 year old instead. There are ways to stand your ground while still being diplomatic and not burn bridges.

I don’t speak the native language of my girlfriend’s parents, and her mother speaks very little English. That didn’t stop us from having a great time when we visited her country.

• it’s my girlfriend’s family time, not mine. I was there just minding my own business while she chatted with her mother. As an introvert, I was totally fine with that.

• Whenever I would be involved in the conversation, my girlfriend would just be the translator.

• Me and her mother could communicate via the universal language of affection: food. She would cook, I would eat (a lot), everyone is happy.

• A few times my girlfriend visited alone, while I explored the city by myself. I even did a solo weekend trip ti a nearby city so that they could spend some time doing mother-daughter activities without having to entertain me as well.

All that to say: everything is possible. If you guys have space to host your parents, then talk with your partner and try to suggest some of the things you read here.

Have you considered the weather in the NL? I live there, currently the sun is out and it’s raining horizontally. Try to picture that.

You also mention that neither you or your husband have good jobs. No shame in that, don’t get me wrong, but the equivalent here (working at Albert Heijn) will not allow you to rent, let alone buy.