I’m just a bit heartbroken and could do with some support.
My partner and I met in a country that we both are not from (I’ve been here for most of my life, but it is notoriously difficult to get permanent residency here so I am on a work visa). We’ve been dating for a year and he’s everything I’ve wanted, and more.
We’ve had a couple of difficult conversations over the last few days and have realised that there’s no way to make this relationship work. I want to move to a country that he has no interest in going to, and vice versa.
I don’t know how to deal with the pain of knowing that this was the right person, just the wrong time. On top of that, is this my fate as an expat? Should I only date once I know where I want to “settle down”, so to speak?
Good on you for prioritizing yourself. It might hurt Ike hell now but you’re making room for someone who will want to plan their life around yours. The longer you stay with someone who isn’t going to do that, the longer you delay finding someone who will.
And if you stay, it will still be painful—but it will be long and drawn out and the pain will come in the form of bitterness and resentment.
You’re making the right call. If you leave, he could follow you if he really wanted to. But chances are he won’t and you’ll end up glad you didn’t put your plans on hold for him….