I’m American and I lived in Germany during college. I realized it would be hard for me to live there because in the US I had come to expect a lot of friendliness in interactions. While individual Germans were super friendly and welcoming, there was just less friendliness in public life. I always felt like I was in the way.
German society runs on social and other rules I didn’t fully grasp, and people were sterner than I was used to. I had the police reprimand me several times, either for not saving my receipt at the grocery (they thought I stole the food), buying the wrong ferry ticket (even though the one I bought cost the same), or accidentally sitting in first class on the train (the train was crowded and I thought “wow I found a seat!”).
The clerks at shops didn’t smile at me and looked very annoyed every time I needed assistance. If they didn’t have a book I was looking for, they weren’t going to recommend another shop that would have it and looked scandalized that I would even ask. 😂
I came to understand and even appreciate the differences, but I never felt quite at home. The programming from childhood runs deep.
This. The social isolation in the US. The car-centric design that makes going anywhere an extra effort.