I live in Germany almost for 8 years now and it is not bad, but I think it is not the country for me, I am not completely happy here, I come from Ecuador which is a beautiful country but every time I go there, because of all the political and security problems I just want to go away. But where should I go if both countries do not make me happy?

  • CodeFarmer@alien.topB
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    1
    ·
    1 year ago

    If you think your unhappiness really is to do with the country you are living in, then you can move again. There are many countries and they’re all different.

    (I’ve lived in 4 now, and have stayed in the last one for 20 years.)

    • DivineAlmond@alien.topB
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      1
      ·
      1 year ago

      I think therapy should take priority before leaving a country you have been living for 8 years lol

  • nixipix1@alien.topB
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    1
    ·
    1 year ago

    I had a discussion with a friend about being ‘homesick for a place that doesn’t exist anymore’ , cause the country or things or people you miss has changed since you left, but you didn’t get to experience the change so to you it just feels foreign now too

    • AcrobaticHeron4862@alien.topB
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      1
      ·
      1 year ago

      I never felt homesick about my former country. I haven’t been back there since I left for Canada. I get the feeling that when I visit eventually, it’s not going to be a place I recognize or that I’ll even feel connected to.

      Canada didn’t feel at home at first but after being here for a while, it now does, especially since I’ve been a permanent resident for a while now. My former country on the other hand may as well be a foreign land.

  • ChetoChompipe@alien.topB
    link
    fedilink
    Español
    arrow-up
    1
    ·
    1 year ago

    Es normal, yo soy de Guatemala y pues siento que Alemania tampoco es el lugar donde me quisiera quedar toda la vida. Llevo 13 años aquí y ni asi siento que es casa ! Viaja y prueba ! O se infeliz toda la vida !

  • Ok_Perspective3862@alien.topB
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    1
    ·
    1 year ago

    “But where should I go if both countries do not make me happy?”

    It’s not the countries that are making you unhappy. Therapy helps.

    Source: Speaking from experience.

    • joeoljoe@alien.topB
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      1
      ·
      1 year ago

      that’s very interesting, what did you find in your therapy sessions? i am in somewhat similar space and wondering if the problem is not the place. I have talked to some therapist, but never reached anywhere.

  • fediverser@alien.top
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    1
    ·
    1 year ago

    This post is an automated archive from a submission made on /r/expats, powered by Fediverser software running on alien.top. Responses to this submission will not be seen by the original author until they claim ownership of their alien.top account. Please consider reaching out to them let them know about this post and help them migrate to Lemmy.

    Lemmy users: you are still very much encouraged to participate in the discussion. There are still many other subscribers on !expats@expats.zone that can benefit from your contribution and join in the conversation.

    Reddit users: you can also join the fediverse right away by getting by visiting https://portal.alien.top. If you are looking for a Reddit alternative made for and by an independent community, check out Fediverser.

  • RoyalTechnomagi@alien.topB
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    1
    ·
    1 year ago

    According to the 85-year Harvard Study of Adult Development, positive social relationships are the most important element of happiness.

    I feel isolated in my new country but keep thinking the next country will change things.

  • The_whimsical1@alien.topB
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    1
    ·
    1 year ago

    Get German citizenship if you can. Even if you have to suck up a couple more years. With German citizenship many possibilities are open.

  • Fitzcarraldo8@alien.topB
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    1
    ·
    1 year ago

    Well, you have a choice if you have educational qualifications. Canada or Australia come to mind. But don’t stay in a place you are not comfortable in.

  • shabby18@alien.topB
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    1
    ·
    1 year ago

    Same buddy! Same!

    I spent an extensive amount of time to find out where to go next. I am in my 4th country/continent now haha. And take my word, there is no perfect country. That’s it, I can’t go to any new continents. Antarctic I don’t want to. Iceland cold is the peak cold I can safely function on. Australia, is a nope country for me because I am an outdoorsy and daring person and my partner thinks this will get me killed there. The last option is Africa. We are both in tech and I doubt there are any great opportunities there. We could work from home like we did in South America but let’s see.

    Moving all together in the 40s is also a challenging task. Maybe this is life.

    • ulfanius@alien.topB
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      1
      ·
      1 year ago

      The things that want to kill you are mostly in the north of Australia. Less things to be worried about if you move south to Melbourne or even Tasmania. New Zealand is also a great country for people who love the outdoors

    • brezhnervous@alien.topB
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      1
      ·
      1 year ago

      Australia, is a nope country for me because I am an outdoorsy and daring person and my partner thinks this will get me killed there.

      Stunningly rare. I don’t like the outdoors unfortunately so feel a bit trapped in a nation which embraces it to such a huge extent.

  • kattehemel@alien.topB
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    1
    ·
    1 year ago

    I hear you, the place I called home doesn’t exist anymore (or has it every existed?); I have yet to find home, and I may never find it.

    And that, is okay. I may be just longing/morning for a sense of belonging I wish I had, but it may not even be real.

  • fractal324@alien.topB
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    1
    ·
    1 year ago

    The grass is always greener elsewhere. “not bad” is actually good imo.

    Personally, I moved to JPN from the US because of a job opportunity over 20 years ago.
    But if given the opportunity to move back, I don’t think I would move back. the US has turned into something I don’t recognize as well as I thought I did.

    I do feel like the perpetual foreigner, but alas.
    I’ve been to Europe on business and enjoy every trip, but that’s because I’m not really living the local life, in a hotel, taking taxis, dining out every night…

  • zqintelecom@alien.topB
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    1
    ·
    1 year ago

    Germany is a disaster. Poor, stubborn, backwards, and racist. Stay away. You’d do well in an English-speaking country.