Currently living in AUS/NZ with SO. We’re going to be trying for a kid soon, but we have no support network here and no family to help out. I think we should move back to the States, where I’m 100% certain family members would come to help us out for as long as we needed. Given the distance, that just wouldn’t happen if we stayed in AUS/NZ. SO thinks we can just handle it on our own.

We wouldn’t need to find new jobs, as we can just transfer internally. Would taking advantage of your home support network be enough of a reason to back to your home country?

  • Nij-megan@alien.top
    BEnglish
    1·
    1 year ago

    Make sure you have the support network that meets your expectations. We moved home once for that same reason and ended up being lonely with very little extra help compared to the social system abroad. Family may or may not be a blessing with your kid and it caused a rift because they were so hands off.

    • cakeilikecake@alien.topBEnglish
      1·
      1 year ago

      I was going to say this. I just moved “home” for multiple reasons, but family help was definitely one of the draws. Family had been talking about helping out and looking forward to all the stuff we could do together. This was offered, not asked for by the way. Everyone has changed their minds on the help offered since we got here. Whether it be items, or physically helping, or spending time with my kids/us. I have received almost zero help. I won’t say zero, because one person has done the bare minimum of what was offered. In fact I have ended up being the one they are coming to for stuff. So not only is my family’s life upended and I am super busy doing all the things moving to a new country require, I’m also being pressured to do more for completely established people. I would actually have more help where we lived before from friends. We were all newer there and banded together to help each other, because we didn’t have support systems. Moving home, I’m needing to start from scratch to build a support system, but because everyone thinks I have one in family, I’m not included as a new comer, so it’s lonelier and more isolated.

    • sunshiineceedub@alien.top
      BEnglish
      1·
      1 year ago

      same. i came back to the US to have my baby for the support system and left when she was 6 months old.